Monday, February 27, 2012

Board wants to fundraise money from everybody but them

The Board of Directors of Metro’s largest charity have adopted a bold new fundraising strategy that will see them raise more than $50 million as long as it doesn’t involve any of them.

The new strategy, called “Together for Tomorrow”, is the latest capital campaign for the Community Foundation Trust of Metro. The fundraising campaign will raise money to help deliver a number of programs designed to eliminate poverty, hunger and homelessness in Metro by 2017.

“We’re confident that the Together For Tomorrow campaign will be able to raise $50 million because of the teamwork and community spirit we have right here in Metro. It will take all of us working together to raise this money and solve these issues. Except the Board of Directors, of course. We give of our time,” said Trust Chairman Rick Bizzell.

The Campaign will raise most of its money from individual donations from citizens who live in and around Metro. At least 100 people will have to make donations of $50,000 or greater over the five year life of the campaign. An estimated 5,000 new annual donors will also be required to make the campaign work. None of them will be members of the Board of Directors, who all gave during the last campaign and would be insulted by being asked again.

“We asked this community to give during our last campaign five years ago, and they gave. Everyone stepped up to the plate. Now, we have to ask them again to reach down into their pockets and give again for the sake of those less fortunate. But not members of the Board. I couldn’t imagine asking them to give again after the earful we got about at our last fundraising pitch. Geez, that was brutal,” said Bizzell.

Campaign chair and Board member Turner Snidely says he’s hopeful Metro will pour out their hearts for their campaign.

“I know how much the people of Metro really care. Every day, I’m touched by the generosity of our community. I know that we will be able to make this campaign a success even if I and most of the Board won’t be giving one red cent,” he said. “We do have really warm feelings about the campaign, though. Honest.”

Trust Executive Director Susan Simple praised the leadership of the Board  in helping getting the campaign off the ground.

“I asked them again and again to give. Even if it’s just five bucks. And they keep on saying that fundraising is for other people and that they already make such an effort and that they don’t get paid for being a volunteer board member and such. If I have to ask them one more time I’ll jump of a cliff,” she said.

People on the streets of Metro are welcoming this opportunity to give to the campaign that the Trust’s Board of Directors says isn’t worth donating to.

“I like making donations to charities where I know the Board doesn’t give. It just makes me want to give even more,” said Zuha Bates, 37, a store owner.

“I like giving to hopeless causes like this one. It makes me feel special,” said Mrs. Petunia Plume, 87, a retired school teacher.

“The fact that they aren’t giving doesn’t affect me one way or another. I sit on the Board of the Metro Social Services Foundation and I don’t give them squat either,” said Doug Newman, 45, a lawyer.

The Together For Tomorrow is expected at least fifty years.